The Art of Appreciation (How to Attract What You Want by Appreciating What You Already Have)
Whenever I used to hear so-called “life coaches” and “self-help gurus” preach about the need for us to be thankful before we can manifest the things we desire, I’d roll my eyes and think, “Oh, no…here we go again with the whole ‘You have to kiss the Universe’s ass before you can get what you want’ crap.”
But then I got a little bit older and a whole lot wiser and I realized that being thankful, grateful, appreciative, etc. isn’t about “kissing the Universe’s ass”—it’s about a fact of life that we all need to be aware of before we can ever hope to create what I call “a life worth dying for”. And that fact is:
If you don’t appreciate what you already have, you’ll never appreciate anything.
Taking this a step further (for all of my metaphysicians and Law of Attraction fans out there), if you don’t appreciate what you’ve already attracted (as in, the people, places, and things you already have in your life), you’ll never attract anything else (as in, anything “bigger” or “better” than what you’ve already got).
This isn’t because the Universe “cares” about how grateful or ungrateful you are or because it seeks to punish you when you don’t thank it enough (because it doesn’t, as it is actually quite indifferent)—it’s because it is metaphysically impossible for us to attract to ourselves, for example, a mansion if we don’t first appreciate the crappy, one-bedroom apartment we currently live in.
Now, why is this? you might ask.
It’s because, as I always say, “you have to vibrate at the level of a homeowner before you can vibrate at the level of a mansion owner”. In other words, you have to be appreciative of all the little things that the Universe gives to you before it will give you the big things. Again, this isn’t because it “has it out for you” or because it “holds back on you” when you’re ungrateful or unappreciative—it’s because attaining the “big things” is like building a penthouse atop a skyscraper: You can’t do it without first building the fifty-something floors (the “little things”) below it.
Now, you may be thinking, “But I don’t want my one-bedroom apartment! I want a mansion, like the one Mark Zuckerberg lives in! Why can’t I just skip right to the part where I live there?”, and look, I hear you, but that’s not the way the Universe works. Allow me to explain, by using my own former circumstances as an example.
Less than two years ago, I, too, lived in a “crappy, one-bedroom apartment”, in an apartment complex which was not-so-affectionately referred to by locals as “Crackwood Apartments”. I couldn’t open its sliding door or bedroom window because the screens were broken (and my cat would have escaped if I did), couldn’t snuggle with my fiancée during our favorite TV shows because we literally had no room for even a small couch, and got sick constantly from black mold that would not stop growing in the shower, no matter how often we cleaned it.
In many ways, that apartment was hell, and my fiancée actually cried when September of 2014 came and we still hadn’t found a house to move into. But still (and here’s the key, so listen up), we appreciated that apartment, because we understood that we needed to “get it out of the way” (from a vibrational point-of-view and for lack of a better term) before we could move on to “bigger and better things”. To this day, we see our time spent in that place not as some terrible, traumatic event in our mutual timeline, but as ones of many stepping stones that led us to where we live now: A four-bedroom, 2,000+ square foot house that I paid for in full in May of 2016, just five months after taking out a mortgage on it.
Before I go any further, notice that I never said we liked our old, crappy apartment. We appreciated it, but we never liked it (and, as a matter of fact, you could even say we loathed it at times, such as when our upstairs neighbor’s girlfriend, in a fit of rage, slammed her car into not only our neighbor’s vehicle, but mine and my fiancée’s as well, doing several hundred dollars worth of damage). Appreciating something is not the same thing as liking something, and the Universe does not require that you like everything you have before you can move on to bigger, better things—but it does require that you appreciate it.
Appreciating doesn’t mean settling for less than you know you deserve, and it doesn’t mean giving up on your hopes and dreams, or accepting delays in the manifestation of that which you truly desire. What it does mean is respecting what you already have as the foundation upon which all the bigger and better things you want will be built.
Think of your dream life as a house. You can’t have a house without a foundation, right?—otherwise it would sink into the earth, or be washed away by the weather—so you need a foundation. And that foundation, from a vibrational perspective, must necessarily be made up of all the “little things” (the “stepping stones”, the short-term goals accomplished, the small “battles” won on the way to winning “the war”, etc.) that we must all “get out of the way” before we can consider ourselves vibrationally (mentally, spiritually, physically) ready for the “big things”.
I hear people say all the time that they want to be a millionaire or a billionaire…that they want a huge house like that of their favorite celebrity…that they want the lifestyle of “the rich and the famous”—but are they actually ready for any of those things? Are you actually ready for any of those things?
Look, poor people win the lottery all the time, but do you know what becomes of most of them? Within one to two years of their lottery wins (maybe five, if they’re really “lucky”), they find themselves not only broke, but worse off than before they won the lottery. Why? Because being wealthy, or owning a mansion (to tie back into what we discussed earlier), is not about how much money (or how much house) you have—it’s about your vibration, and whether or not it’s “high” enough to sustain such things. As a very wise man once said, “If someone hands you a million dollars, best you become a millionaire, or you won’t get the keep the money.”
I plan to discuss the art of raising your vibration, and of maintaining a “high” vibration (or a “wealth consciousness”, as its sometimes called) in much greater detail in future posts, but for now I will say this: It’s not a coincidence when people win the lottery, just like it’s not a coincidence that I went from earning less than $20,000 a year in 2014 to earning over $400,000 in 2016, and just like it’s not a coincidence that you’re here right now, reading this blog post. Conversely, it’s also not a coincidence when lottery winners go bankrupt, when people like me succeed where countless others have failed, or when someone like you uses what they learn in posts like this to become even bigger successes than me. Simply put, there is no such thing as coincidence—and there is no such thing as luck, either, for that matter.
Everything that shows up in our lives, whether it’s a couple million dollars, a humongous mansion, or this website, shows up because we’ve attracted it to ourselves through our own, personal vibration. In other words, all the people, places, and things you find in your life are there not by random chance, but because they are a vibrational match for who you are right now—not who you think you are, who you like to pretend to be in front of your friends, or who you could be—but who you really are, at this very moment; who the Universe/God/whatever higher power you believe in knows you to be.
This being the case, when you look around you and see, for example, the aforementioned “crappy, one-bedroom apartment”, a shitty, dead-end day job, or a terrible relationship with another person, what you are seeing is not something that is beneath you, but rather something that is you; a physical manifestation, or a reflection, if you will, of that which you currently are—and that which you need to appreciate (not like, but appreciate) before you can grow into the bigger, better you that you need to be to attract the bigger, better things you claim to want.
Speaking of claiming to want certain things, and to further illustrate the points I’ve just made, I’d like to tell you a story about my old friend, Lawrence, who I am no longer friends with, for reasons that will become obvious to you as the story unfolds:
A few years ago, I was visiting Lawrence—then a young, naive, 21-year-old who was living at home with his mother in a crappy two-bedroom apartment (not unlike the crappy, one-bedroom one I used to live in)—and I noticed that he had pennies scattered all around the floor of his bedroom. Knowing then what I know now (about the need to appreciate what we already have before we can attain that which we truly desire), I decided to test him, because I needed to know a few things: First, whether he had any potential to become wealthy/successful and second, whether he was worthy of continuing to be counted among the small, tight-knit group of people I consider my friends.
“I see you have all these pennies lying around here,” I said to Lawrence. “Why don’t you pick them up and put them in a jar, or maybe deposit them into your bank account?”
He then said exactly what I expected him to say: “I don’t know.” (Typical answer that losers who are going nowhere in life give to most questions of substance.)
“Okay,” I said, “so let me ask you another question: If you were offered a million dollars—no questions asked, no strings attached—would you take it?”
His face suddenly lit up with excitement and, again, he responded quite predictably, “Hell yeah, I would!”
“Would it be safe to say that you wanted a million dollars before I even asked you about it?” I asked. “Like, maybe you thought a few years ago that it would be great to have that much money?”
“Yeah, you could say that.”
“Okay, great. Now, how many pennies do you think are lying around here?”
“I don’t know,” said Lawrence, as he quickly scanned the area with his eyes, “maybe five or six.”
“Okay, we’ll call it six. So you have six cents lying around here—yet you won’t pick them up, won’t save them, and can’t be bothered to deposit them into your bank account…yet you claim to want a million dollars. What kind of message do you think that sends the Universe?”
Lawrence, who was somewhat into the occult and esoteric philosophy, but who was also a heavy drinker and a chronic pot smoker, became very confused. Again he said “I don’t know.”
With that, I decided to do what Lawrence had been letting most people do for him for the first 21 years of his life, and I did his thinking for him.
“I will tell you what kind of message it sends: It sends a message that says ‘I, Lawrence, don’t really want a million dollars, because if I did, I would realize that the six cents lying on my bedroom floor were possibly the first six cents of the million dollars I’d asked for being offered to me, and that by my rejecting those six cents, I’ve actually rejected the million dollars in their entirety.’
All Lawrence could do was stare blankly at me; he was clearly far too dull to comprehend what I was saying to him (much like Jesus’s disciples were much too dull to understand his parables). Immediately, Matthew 7:6 of the New Testament popped into my head—“Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do they may trample them under their feet…”—and I realized that Lawrence was a pig and that those pennies on his floor (or my teachings about them), were pearls.
Following that conversation, Lawrence and I continued to visit with each other off and on for a few more months, but it soon became apparent that, like most drifters/losers, he had no interest in bettering himself or reaching his full potential, and so I cut him—someone I’d been friends with for six years—out of my life completely. To drive home for him how much of a loser I thought he was, I told him in no uncertain terms that he would not be receiving an invitation to my wedding—and that was after I’d told him he’d been in consideration to be my Best Man.
I’m not going to sugarcoat this: Lawrence is not what I call a “like-minded, success-oriented individual”, meaning he has zero potential for becoming wealthy or successful, therefore he has no business being my friend. Friends should inspire and motivate and add value to each others’ lives, but as Lawrence was too ignorant to even appreciate the abundance at his feet, it’s obvious that he isn’t capable of appreciating me or my friendship (which, in my opinion, is worth far more than a few pennies), which is why I had no choice but to cut him from my life. Had I kept him around, he could only have dragged me down to a lower vibration, and I’ve worked too long and too hard to reach the vibratory heights I’ve reached in the last two years to throw it all away for ungrateful, uninitiated swine like him that are incapable of adding value to my life.
If what I just said sounds harsh to you, I tell you that while what I did to Lawrence was indeed harsh, it was also necessary, because to help people (in this case, Lawrence to hopefully become wealthy some day) sometimes you have to hurt them. And when I say hurt them, I don’t mean “go out of your way to hurt them” but rather to allow them to hurt themselves. In other ways, when the ungrateful, the uninitiated, and the unsuccessful among us think, speak, behave, and believe in such a way that they are guaranteed to fail, we let them fail—not because we want to see them suffer, but because they must suffer before they ever have any hope of succeeding. As I always say, “success is built upon a foundation of failure”.
In conclusion, and in going forward, my advice to you is this: If you see a penny, pick it up. And then put it in your car’s coin tray, a piggy bank at home, or your bank account—but whatever you do, do not disrespect it or its value and cast aside as if it’s worthless because, for all you know, that penny may not be just any penny, but the first penny out of a hundred million more (a.k.a.: a million dollars) that you asked for days, weeks, months, or even years ago, finally making its way into your life. And if you live in a crappy, one-bedroom apartment, feel stuck in a shitty, dead-end day job, or trapped in a terrible relationship with someone, don’t disrespect those things by seeing them as symbols of everything you think is “wrong” with your life, but respect them for the role they’re playing in your life as stepping stones to bigger and better things, or as pieces of the foundation of failure upon which all of your future success will someday rest.
Thank you so much for taking time out of your busy schedule to be here today! I hope you’ve enjoyed reading this post as much as I enjoyed writing it!
Please leave a comment below and tell me how you feel about this post, or better yet, visit its sister thread in the Manifestation Machine Forum and join the discussion about the topics covered herein. I can’t wait to hear from you, and neither can the millions upon millions of your fellow Mechanics!